Busy, Busy Busy!

After an exhausting week at work, Gordon and I went to see to Emily in Denton on Friday. Its a long drive - 420 miles round trip but it was great to see her, even if she did seem somewhat stressed out. In fact she was so stressed out by the end of the semester, she burst in to tears whilst we were eating dinner. Much as we tried to reassure her and to say, as long as she is passing the classes, that we aren't expecting straight A's, she will no doubt have spend her weekend stressing. Her college seems much more competitive than either of the other 2's schools or maybe they just hide it better. I thought I would check out the UNT bloggers and yep! they were stressing out big time as well. So I will need to make sure I am calling more frequently in the next few weeks to try and calm her down. Not easy over a phone!

The one good thing is that she knows from next semester, she will only have to do 15 credit hours and a total of 30 each year to complete her degree leading to 120 in total. Originally it was something like 145 which would have entailed 16-17 hours each semester plus summer school if she wanted to complete in 4 yrs. Now she can be assured she will graduate in 4 yrs rather than 5, assuming she doesn't fail any classes, which they all do at one point. But at least now, she would be able to redo them in the summer sessions. Wish they would institute retakes for tests like the UK system as well, as all these extra classes cost so much money!

Anyway, we had a great day with Emily, visiting the Dallas Museum of Art to see the Turner exhibition which was out of this world. I had forgotten how extraordinary his work was but living a 15 min work from the original Tate gallery, he was my earliest idol in the art world but having been 'brought up' with him, I had probably gotten blasé about his work. I don't think there is a modern artist even today who could beat him with his quality of light and abstractness. His work is just amazing, nearly 200 yrs later.

I supsect we will not be visiting the Dallas Museum of Art too often though as driving through Dallas is a nightmare! After neogiating the one way streets, parking was hideously expensive. We spend 2 hours going around the exhibit and were going to have a coffee before looking at some other work, only to discover it closed at 5.00(!!!), which was 10 mins later. We thought the Arts district, must have some interesting places to see or somewhere to eat. No such luck, just a sea of high raised building making the place seem very claustrophobic.

Now I am on my high horse, what is it about modern art buildings, ( American ones at least) that seem to think, high, white wall with nothing on them will induce someone to love art. Yet again on entering the Dallas Art Museum, we were faced by cold, stark white walls which seem to stretch for miles. It has to be one of the most unwelcoming foyers going! Then once you get your ticket, you have walk down a long corridor with nothing on its walls. I have been hospitals that were more welcoming.

Thankfully Turner's art more than made up for the coldness and unfriendliness of the gallery but as I said it would have to an extraordinary artist to get us back again.

I had to work on Saturday but yesterday I had the day off and had an excellent afternoon at the Austin Art Fair. This was the first big event we attended in our first year here, 8 yrs ago. We thought it was big then but its huge now. Most of the art is pretty standard, some of it hideous but quite a few more than interesting. Will definitely going next year, especially if the weather is as good as it was yesterday. A nice cool breeze and only in the mid 70's, just right for walking around looking at art and drinking a couple of beers.

Just thought I would share this photo though. Motor bikes like Europeans ride (not the Harley Davidson fake ones) are becoming increasingly popular around here with the younger generation. Unlike the Harley Davidsons crowd they seem to value their heads and actually wear helmets. However, unfortunately for girls with low rise jeans, clingly on leads to this. My husband could barely keeps his eyes on the road with this immediately in his eyesight!

Anyway after an enjoyable weekend, its back to work, 47 hrs this week!

Wow, the 2nd April

and I am still working! and more to the point, enjoying it, despite being rarely in the Frame shop. It appears that this time of year is a slow part of the year for framing so even though they are swamp with work, they don't have the hours to have more than 1 framer at a time on duty. Most days there isn't a framer in the shop until 11 which is the time the head framer arrives. So if you need a frame, goes in the pm, as that is when the framer is most likely to be in.

This "hours" available in retail still baffles me. The same thing happens in all stores from what I can gather. Basically it means if you have slack sales, the staff hours are cut and it varies each week. So if last week was a slow one, this week the hours will be cut so if the shop gets mobbed, there are not any staff available, so staff are called in at late notice ( so might not be available) and the following week there might be more hours because Wednesday was mobbed. And so the merry go round goes on and on.

So if you walk into a shop and there are no staff, it means sales are slack and you are not going to get serve quickly and if like me, that happens to you too many times, (like 3 times in row) you are not going to go back. Too many customers like me and those hours get cut even more, ending up with even more lost customers. Weird way to manage if you ask me but it seems be prevalent in all retail shops.

Anyway all this working is playing havoc with my creative time. I had gotten myself into a routine when I would settle into working in the afternoons and evenings (unless I was feeling miserable which was too often). Now I have to fit it in with the housework and an ever changing timetable. No two weeks are the same at work, which is another of the mysteries of retail. Why can't they do a regular schedule? Each week I see the person responsible for the rota, pulling her hair out putting people, here there and everywhere. Once the rota is posted (like today for next week), you see people trading times as they have already made arrangements for that day. How are people meant to organise their lives if they don't know what hours they are working from week to week. Of course, it comes back to the available 'hours' again.

So basically my creative time is screwed up which means I am not doing very much creative stuff but I am getting there. Last night, despite being really tired, I pushed myself to finish off the curtains I was making. Of course, being a complete novice at this task. it is taking me way too long.

So what else is happening in my life apart from work. Not much to be honest. Alan and Emily are at their respective colleges. Emily appears to be doing well and should pass her finals comfortably. Hopefully we will go and visit her either this weekend or next (depends on my work schedule which is unknown at this moment in time) All too soon she will have completed her first year and then she will moving into an apartment in August.

Alan? Alan, well, lets just say, its in the air at the moment. There may well be decision made re his future in the coming months but whatever they are, he will cope with it. We don't know how his future is panning out but he isn't freaking out about it, so we aren't because only Alan knows what goes on in that head of his. Basically he knows the score as far as we are concerned and only he can decide how that turns out.

Elisabeth is still in San Marcos and somehow, that town has sucked whatever life she had in her, out of her. She seems to have lost that driving force that was with her in the beginning and is settling for what she has which is not the girl we knew and loved. However, she is making the decisions now and its her life. Her father and I have given up on giving any advice because any we give, is just toss to the side. Now I know she will read this and blow hot with rage, saying we don't understand and she will be right, we don't understand. She is almost 23 now, so despite our misgivings about what appears to be a surrender to a life she hates, she is the one who is in charge of her life.

I am sure all our parents when through exactly the same things, in fact, I know my Mum and Dad still worry like mad about all their girls but that is the other part of parenting, letting go and letting the child make the mistakes. Its hard to watch and its hard not to despair but most of the time, it works out because the ground work was done in childhood.

So we are learning to let go and watch from the sidelines, just as we did when they first went to school but now its the real deal. It so bloody hard!!!

Just another Sunday

and I am tired from not doing a lot. Most of the weekend I have spend upstairs either in the Laundry room where I do my messy artwork or the spare room where I do all my beading. I managed to finish one project completely, almost complete 2 more and thinking about at least 2 more that I plan to start this week whilst still having a couple on the go. Yes, I really should concentrate on one thing at a time but never seem to do that.

Big achievement of the weekend was learning out to use the table saw and router. Gordon had bought some wood which we are going to mount the curtain tracks on, so it was an opportune time to learn the basics. He has a stack of scraps in a box, so some time this week I will do some practising and hopefully I will get over my nerves. Once that is cracked, I will be able to make some frames for a whole load of prints we have stash away. Actually they aren't even stashed away, they have been sitting on the pool table for the last 4-6 months!

Last night we went to see a great movie "In Bruges" which starred Colin Farrell. Never thought much of him, to be honest, but in this film, he was brilliant. It really is a funny movie but with lots of pathos as well. Bruges looked good in it as well!

Other big drama of the weekend, is that Emily wants to move out of the dorms into an apartment. Obviously we want her to stay in dorms (it would cheaper for her) but nothing is going to stop her from her objective, so we may as well suck it up and accept it, as long as she doesn't complain at later date. Are you reading this and saying we say the same to our kids but they don't listen. Young Adults, are you reading to this and thinking this is what my parents say but they don't understand me. Join the club, we are all in together and together we will get through it.

I must admit I was more than happy to be hostels at college and not having to worry about rent, electricity etc but it seems we made our girls more independent than I was at 19. Even Alan has finally got a transfer to San Antonio (work, not university) and is planning to move into an apartment for the summer. Were we bad parents? LOL. It actually good to see them go out and grab their independence, (on our buck, mind) but then its a worry as well, knowing they have to study. work and work some more, just to survive week to week.

Anyway, the upstairs beckons, need to get on with these projects. Tomorrow I am going to Joann's to get some material to make curtains for the living room and dining room (we have wooden blinds at the moment). What! its only taken me 6 yrs to get to this stage. The whole house might be done before we sell up.

emily

emily
Originally uploaded by jacqui126

I started this yesterday, its part of my beaded dolls recalling the kids when they were younger. This will be Emily. Watch for its progress on my other blog where I have posted some more of my recent work

I drunk too much tonight

which is the reason I am here at 3.38 am and now I am suffering the consequences but I enjoyed whilst it lasted. Currently I am at that stage where you feel very thirsty but nothing quenches your thirst and a slight headache is there.

At least there there will be a reason for the headache today. Yesterday before I started drinking I was miserable. I had a headache again! I suspect that I am allergic to ragweed as it seems to coincide with those particular high pollens and my uterus was cramping like mad! If I didn't know better I would think I was about to start my period. So I was in the mood to go mad on the alcohol front despite my diet and it worked, for few brief hours, my pain was gone. That was good. I can live with headache because I was bad and I enjoyed it.

Yesterday evening was good, Elisabeth was home for a few hours and she is so much more positive about her future. She is looking good as well. She is busy applying for jobs which will take her out of state but that is good. I know she will be succeed in getting a job and the world is her oyster. It is great to see her so positive after all the negativity of the last year.

Emily phoned on Friday and she is beginning to to see the long hard road that lies ahead of her in the art world which is good because you need to how far you have to climb to achieve your goals. I have been telling her all the time that if you want to go into the arts, its a long hard road but until you are there, its hard to appreciate how hard that road is. Too many kids go into the Arts thinking its the easy option but its not. Its like anything in life, aim high and you might get somewhere near where you want to be in the end.

Anyway, the alcohol is beginning to wear off now and reality will hit hard in the next few hours. OK, I am sworn off wine and beer for the next 6 days, sugar where is the sugar?

Well, that was unexpected

in that I didn't expect to it happened. What? you may ask.

I went for my gynaecological visit yesterday and I knew from the Internet forums (hystersisters which I found when I had my ablation) what to expect. The Doc would recommend a uterine biopsy and a sonogram however I naively thought I would have the biopsy at another time. It seems that a lot of sisters have been told to take several Advil or other painkillers before the procedure as it can be quite painful. So understandably I was a bit nervous of the upcoming procedure. Yes it was painful but not so I was fainting or anything, as others have discribed and it was only slightly longer than having a pap done. Yesterday afternoon I had some slight cramping and bleeding but nothing out of the ordinary to be honest. I will get the results in 3 wks when I have the sonargram and see the Doctor again. I suspect my ovaries have just come back to life for a few months and that I am not in fact over the menopause but at least these tests will confirm that.

On Tuesday night we had our first call from Emily where she was obviously feeling overwhelmed and a little homesick. I must have calmed her down a bit because by the time she spoke to her Dad, he wasn't even aware of the fact she had been crying.

Happy Birthday Alan

Today is my son's 20th Birthday. I love him to bits but he has been causing me grief that only a son can managed since before he was born! I was in and out of hospital with false labour pains 4 times before he surfed into the world 2 wks early. I mean surfed out as he came out so fast, the midwife had to do a running catch to stop him from dropping to the ground!

Well, its very quiet in the house

and boy, its weird. Not that its normally that noisy but usually, I am thinking at this time in the day, need to get things done, Emily will be home from school soon but today the first only person back, will be Gordon at 5.35pm approx ( I look forward to him as well lol).

We took Emily up to Denton (210 miles each way) on Sunday and it was a mad house when we arrived. We quickly went up to her room which we were relieved to find was quite spacious for 2 people sharing and light. I think we were half expecting it to be like Elisabeth's first dorm room which was far from spacious and very dark, which made us feel depressed even more than Elisabeth, I think. Emily's roommate had already arrived (although she wasn't there at the time) and everything was neatly in order. By the time, we left, Emily had unpacked and although everything had a place, it had a definite Emily feeling to it, chaotic order.

Emily's friend from school had arrived a few hours earlier and quickly came over to inspect the quarters. Once Emily had unpacked we went to have dinner with Emily's friend and her family. All too soon it was time to leave. We had done very well up that point but then the tears came (all of us). It was definitely the hardest parting we have had with any of the kids and I was in tears until way beyond Fort Worth and if I thought about her, the tears would quickly spring in my eyes.

I spoke to her a few times yesterday and she seems to be settling in well, although for the first night she stayed in Brooke's dorm room. Apparently, her room-mate who hails from Fort Worth, didn't come back so she didn't want to spend her first night alone.

Emily when we first arrived in Austin in 2000.


On Saturday, she turns 18 and it will be strange not be with her for such an important birthday. I am sure I will be on the phone lots for the next few days but once her classes start on next Monday, she will be on her way to a successful life.




Emily Now.

The last couple of days I have been in right Funk

and I think there are several reasons.

The first is my body is acting up. It started last week with my nipples becoming really sore, then very hard and my breasts swelling, if I did know better I would have said I was breast feeding! Then on Monday I began to have those cramps we women are so prone to which was somewhat of a surprise as I have been told that I am pass menopause. Even more surprising was having some spotting on Tuesday which turn into a slight flow on Wednesday. Needless to say, I was straight onto the phone on Wednesday for an appointment with the gynaecologist but the earliest I could one is next Thursday. It feels like when I had adenomyosis but if I am post menopausal then that should have disappeared. Anyway, no doubt I am in for a string of tests and probably end up with a hysterectomy. I wish I had taken up that offer last time rather than the ablation but it seemed so radical then and I was so obviously perimenopausal at the time. Blah!

The 2nd is job searching! I am at it again and again it fills me with despair. I decided to look at Craig's list and sure enough there are jobs there I that I might be interested in. I actually applied for one at a pre-school locally and they called back immediately. I had interview arranged for 2pm the next day. I duly arrived, only to find the person who was interviewing me had popped out to do some personal chores! I found this out between bits of conversation with the lady I was talking to as she was on the phone, setting up her DSL connection. (I think she was meant to manning reception but it was hard to tell, tic). Anyway in between conversation with her sales rep on the phone, she managed to say she would speak to me about the job and to fill out the application form. I hate that, why fill in an application form when you have send them a resume!

She eventually finished with her dsl connection (by which time I knew her life story) and spoke to me briefly. She then show me the class where I might be assisting but as the kids were just coming to the end of nap time, I thought it wasn't the best time to introduce a stranger to them. So I arranged to return the next morning when they would be more lively.

I returned at 10am yesterday and was briefly spoken to by the person who was meant to interview me the previous day, then I was shown into the room which was now a different class as they were in the midst of rearranging the kids. The kids were great but it was a small class so I was lucky. After half an hour, the other lady came to me and I spoke to again briefly. Mainly I wanted to know what the salary was .......$7.50 an hour....less than my youngest daughter (17) earned all summer and considerably less than Alan(19) is currently earning! I could understand it if it was some local pre-school nursery but its a national company (Children's courtyard)!

Anyway, this morning I am off to a job fair in Austin with my resumes, so something may turn up but I am not too hopeful to be honest. Am I am being too picky wanting to be paid a decent wage, certainly better than my youngest daughter and hopefully more than my Son but it seems I am whistling in the wind in that regard.

The 3rd reason I am in funk is because this week the kids go back to college. On Sunday, my youngest is moving 250 miles north to Denton, to begin her degree in Photography (hopefully). I think I will miss Emily much more than when the other 2 left because over the last year or so, we have become much closer. I definitely know her more than when she was little when she was lost between the worlds of her brother and sister. I am very confident she will do fine at university as she an inner confident in herself and her abilities, I can only envy. If you met her on first take, you would probably think she is shy (which she is in certain ways) but after than initial take, you soon realise this girl has an inner drive that will get her to places. So I will miss her tremendously and probably have a good cry as we drive home to Austin on Sunday but I am sure she is destined to succeed in life.

I have been in such a funk, that I haven't even been reading the blogs or if I do read them, I can barely skim over them, much less comment on them. I haven't touch my beading this week and nothing can seem to interest me. Hopefully this is passing and I will be back to normal once Monday comes along and new era in our lives (Gordon and I) comes about. It will be weird not having any kids in the house!

I am sitting here

desperately trying not to fall asleep. Last night was the worst night's sleep I have had since not having any sleeping pills. I spend a good part of the night pretending I was asleep in the hope I would actually sleep. However its not that bad yet, as to date I have only had 2 really restless sleepless nights (the night before was the other), so I am hoping that as long as I keep myself busy today, by the time we go to bed I will sleep just from exhaustion.

The one thing I have noticed in the past week, is that if I don't bead, I am less sleepy. So obviously being creative during the day is exactly what my brain is craving for.

With that end in mind, I began the process of reclaiming the upstairs from the hands of Alan. Since he came home from college at the end of May, he has steadily spread his mess unchecked to almost all the rooms. It has gotten to the stage were his sister, Emily, myself and Gordon are too uncomfortable to even go up there! Yesterday, that began to change as I moved his stuff out of the large spacious room he has, to the much smaller bedroom. It felt so good. To be fair to Alan, he was ok about me moving his stuff from the room and he can be tidy, even vacuuming all of upstairs in the first weeks he came home, it just most of the time he isn't tidy, at home at least.

So what is happening to the room I have just vacated, well its going to become my studio. To be honest I have been eyeing it up for just that purpose since the day we moved in. It will have a spare bed in it for Elisabeth when she comes to stay but for the most part it will be my studio, all 12' x12' approx of it (actually it probably larger but I haven't measured it).

Apparently Alan told Emily that to make sure he doesn't come home next summer and she turned around to him, saying, " well, Mum doesn't want you to come back next summer, anyway." I don't think I would have said it as brutally as that as I enjoy the company of the kids but I would be laying down the law about being tidy more next summer!

Back in Pflugerville

Jeeze, that is a long drive, especially when the sun is beating down.

Well, Emily is all signed for the beginning of the next 4 yrs of hard slog. She nearly didn't get to sign up for classes as the computer wasn't allowing her to do drawing and design classes. It turns out she had been accepted for the college of Art and Sciences to do Mathematics, even though she had applied for Photography and maths. Anyway, I would be have ranting if I had been her, as all of yesterday was spend with advisers on which courses she should take. You would have thought that they would have done the basics and checked that she was actually accepted as a Maths Student,not Art and that she needed to change her major. Still, she calmly told her Dad (I had to disappear for a minute), told him she was going the Art Building to sort things out and she did.

I must admit the art programme at UNT seems very structured and aiming to get the best out of their students. Wish my degree programme had been so organised.

It was a frantic 3 days for Emily and not so frantic for us. As I stated in my previous post, I got a little drunk on Monday night. It doesn't take that much these to be honest but I enjoyed it at the time. Not so good for getting up at 7.30 am and listening to round of people telling you what a great place UNT is and oh, by the way, this is where you pay! Actually the presentations were very good and informative.

I think the worse aspect about the whole thing were the insects- Gordon and I were covered in bites.

Here are some photos from the last few days

ART. this was outside the art building so I am assuming was a project of some sort.I thought it was great, especially all the wild flowers.

The dorm where where we were staying. Apart from looking newer, dormshaven't changed much over the years. Still cramped for space.

Map of UNT Campus

The clock tower and the symbol for the Mean Greens - an eagle

Gordon


His leg showing the bites. Just hope the mossies don't have West Nile now.




Downtown Dallas as we were driving on the I35 west.

I had moment of impulse (part 1)

which ruined my day and I still don't know how I feel about it.

It was the end of a unscheduled 24 hours.


Few things happened, none of them that big or out of the ordinary but combined made me edgy,angry and excited , not a good thing, in light of early afternoon.

Basically, my eldest daughter made me feel like a bad parent as we are finally terminating her car insurance payments paid by us, so she has to pay for her own insurance. She is beginning to panic because come August all our financial support will be gone and now she is wondering how she is going to live.

I am panicking because I know she has been walking with her head in the sand for so long that despite knowing that we would be stopping her allowance this year she hasn't done anything. It was going to be on her 22nd birthday but now August and she has still not figure out loans etc. Of course that makes me and Her Dad worry but we have say NO eventually, especially with Emily beginning University next year.


Anyway she managed to make me feel even more guilty with her 2nd call of the day, yesterday as she has got herself a job for the summer at IHOP. This will be on top her research work (not paid as per norm for intern work but will give her credits for her master apparently) and summer classes starting this week. ( which reminds me there must be fees to be paid but no notification from the University - why?)

That made me feel terrible as here am I, just slopping around the house and seemingly unable to get a job! Not that would make a difference because even if I had a job, we would be stopping her allowance, paying for a degree and 4 yrs of living expenses doesn't seem that bad. However, kids have a way of guilting you as most parents will agree. So that put me on edge and slightly angry but not explosively angry. Just normal parental frustration.

The other thing that had me on edge was the welfare of Angus, our dog. After being at the vets for a day and us waiting around for blood tests, it turns out he has a bacterial infection but nothing serious.

Excitement was caused by Emily, my youngest, nearly 18, getting her first car. Anxiety caused by the fact my little girl has a CAR! She was delighted of course, despite the fact she now owes us a considerable amount of money (well considerable to her). SHOCK because at the beginning of the day we hadn't planned on getting a car although I have been looking without success for a good month now. It seems decadent to have 5 cars amongst 5 people but what else are you do with no public transport and everyone going in different directions.

Disappointment at only losing 0.8lbs at weight watchers but pleased that I am now putting myself forward at weight watchers, giving anecdotal answers, knowing I should be more confident and outgoing to be more successful.
.

We are dodging the bullets

at home, at the moment.

Yesterday had been a great day. In the afternoon, we went to BBQ being held for Emily's friend who graduated on Friday and will be attending UNT with her. They have been friends since 6th grade and her family see Emily almost like another daughter. I must admit I am very pleased that Brooke has decided to attend the same university as Emily as she has grown up a lot in the past 18 months, just like Emily.

In the evening, we went to the Morrissey Concert at the Backyard venue at Beecaves. It was brilliant and amazingly the rain held off for the whole night. The ironic thing is that when the Smiths were at their height in the mid 80's I hated Morrissey so much I had to switch the TV off. It wasn't the music I disliked but him. I have been like that as a child, if there is a performer I cannot physically like I have shield my eyes or switch off the TV. Mick Jagger and Tom Jones were other people I really couldn't stand when I was younger.

Anyway we got home about 11.45pm and we thought it was odd that Kelsey's car (Emily's other best friend) was parked outside our house, as we were under the impression they were going to another graduation party, so they must have gotten home early. No, Alan was home but not the girls and he didn't know who had taken them to the party. Then it was mentioned that a boy around the corner had a party going on. No, Emily wouldn't go there because of the history between us, not a happy history.

Anyway we settled to watch a tivo'd episode of "my name is earl" and just as it was finishing Emily and Kelsey came in it. They quickly dived upstairs and I must admit, both of them were looking decidedly tired and bleary eyed. No surprise there, as they had both been celebrating graduation since Friday night which included a lock down at school where they are locked into the school from 11pm -6am in the morning, doing various 'fun' activities.

So we didn't really pay attention to them but Alan did, quickly dashing down to inform us that both of them were decidedly drunk. To be honest I was furious, not because they were drunk necessarily as all teenagers step over the line given the chance but the fact it was the graduate's parents who had served them drinks when it quite clearly against the law. I went upstairs and checked on them, got the story from them and then discuss it with Gordon.

Your immediate response is to call the police but then Emily would be cited for drinking underage and more than likely the real people in trouble, the parents would deny all wrong doing. So we figured it would be best leave it as be, give Emily a huge lecture the following morning and Kelsey is effectively banned from staying over night, as this isn't the first time we have heard she had gotten drunk in recent weeks (we are glad she is going to different uni as she is turning into a bit of a wild child).

Alan, unfortunately, has long history with this graduate and his family, isn't so forgiving and once we were off to bed, called the police. Sure enough he managed to tell the police without Emily being involved but in the end his call solved nothing as they couldn't get any evidence that the parents were serving alcohol to minors despite the fact the house was full of drunk teenagers.

Now Alan is angry. Angry at Emily for being so stupid. Angry because the parents weren't punished. Angry with Emily for being friends with someone he hates with reason. And finally angry that 3 yrs ago he was punished whilst the same graduate from last night didn't get punished, in fact treated as a victim.

Alan made it clear in no uncertain terms of what he thought of Emily and what he perceives of her betrayal in being friendly with this boy. Alan is very much like me sometimes, so I know he will be brewing on this for a least another day before he calms down. As for Emily, she has been duly chastised and left with no doubt of what we think of her behaviour. Until then we will be dodging the bullets.

Today was the annual boob sqeezing

event at the local radiological center in Round Rock. In addition to being pushed and squeezed the way no boob should be, I had my first bone scan, signs that old age is knocking at the door if I don't watch it. I suppose I should be grateful as if I was in the UK, with no family history of breast cancer, I wouldn't have even had a mammogram yet.

However, it seems the more tests the better over here, as I have good insurance and that is the big BUT. Since I have move over here I have had an MRI of my head and my back, xrays of my back, colonscopy, a couple of ultrasounds of my uterus, 5 mammograms, a bone density scan and too many blood tests to count plus other things I am sure.

My next visit to my gynaecologist will be to discuss an vaginal vault repair I need for rectocele caused in no small part by having 1 baby of 8lbs 12oz and the last being 10lbs 3ozs, getting stuck by the shoulders in the process. I must admit I have known I had a problem for years but the thought of an operation just wasn't a happy thought but recently the problem has become just too bad to ignore.

Well, my life seems to have taken over by the kids or should I say the house has been taken over by Alan. He doesn't do much but somehow his presence is everywhere. At the moment I am on the PC because that way I can escape from the surround sound which is currently blasting out at the moment, as he and his girlfriend watch some horror dvd. At night, in our bedroom, you hear his voice booming as he talks to his girlfriend on the phone for 2 hours (his room is above ours). It not that he is shouting, far from it but his voice is deep and resonance much further than a normal voice for some reason.

Poor Elisabeth is having a tough week. She had a lot to cheer about last Friday as she has been accepted officially for the masters program she applied for. However, since then her truck (an 1995 S10) has collapse on her, probably needing a new water pump and then yesterday, she switch on her PC and nothing! Even worse than that, this week she is 22 so we have finally said, no more car insurance and come August, she is on her own financially. I must admit I feel really really bad about that and worry how she is going to cope but then other 22 yrs do. However, that doesn't stop me worrying. At least she is guarantee a TA job which will pay her fees for the course but then she needs to find loans for living expenses. Somehow I think she will need to cut back on some things she is going to find hard to do.

Emily had her rehearsal for the graduation today, another one tomorrow and then the real deal on Friday.

So tomorrow I need to buy a small graduation gift (about $20) and a present for Elisabeth for her birthday on Saturday. I know what I am getting (she has already had some it when she gave down last week) but I can't say at the moment as she does read this blog sometimes. Its not a traditional gift, she might be insulted by it but she needs it, so hopefully she will be happy.

Not a lot happening around here

Its been a odd sort of week, going faster than normal, so much so I thought yesterday was Friday and kept having to remind myself it was only Thursday.

Yesterday was the last full school day for Emily and this time next week exactly, we will be in the Frank Irwin Center watching her class walk in to graduate. She has almost certainly decided she wont be going to Scotland this summer after all, as she has seen her brother and sister struggling with money, so wants to save more money before she starts her classes at the end of August. In a way I am disappointed as I thought it would be a good thing for her to go to Scotland on her own but staying with people we trusted but I understand where she is coming from. Especially as she is going to study Photography not the cheapest course to be doing, with all the equipment it needs.

Below is a video of the Skara, our little princess who I almost poisoned accidentally the other day. I am still not sure if she is really OK as she seems a lot quieter than normal plus she puked up a huge fur ball, very liquid and at looking like some ugly snake, which was full of hair and grass. Its on it side because I forgot I was taking a video and not a picture. As you can see she is very noisy little princess and demands attention, particularly when I am hand sewing at the kitchen table!

Mother"s day

just a couple of pics of the weekend.

Alan arrived home with all his stuff yesterday and Elisabeth is home for the night at least, so we are five some again. I love having all the family around for a few days at a time.

Today is Mother's day in the US (Mothers day in the UK is the 4th Sunday of Lent.) Emily bought me a huge bouquet of Flowers and the most delicious chocolate covered strawberries.

Elisabeth came home this afternoon and gave me a selection of stamps based on Mexican cravings. She really must be in tune with my artist endeavours at the moment as unbeknown her I have been reading about and drawing Mexican symbols for a few weeks now.

Alan forgot it was Mother's day until his girlfriend reminded him yesterday but by then it was too late as he was on his way to his best friend Anna's prom. He may sound more Texan than Scottish these day but he will never give up being proud of his roots.

dressed up for the prom

Heart in my mouth

I watched Emily drive the SUV out of the drive to get to work for the first time. She has had her full driving licence for a while now but refused to drive the SUV as she was quite rightly scared. She says its was just the SUV but really its driving itself she is scared of and I really don't blame her. I am glad I didn't have to drive at her age, 17, (didn't learn until I was 31) and if we were in Scotland I doubt she would be but here to get anywhere you need a car. However, she called me when she arrived and said with a huge sigh of relief "I made it!"

So this week will be memorable for 2 reasons for her. Last night she won the school medal for her photography and now she has the confidence to tackle college. She will need it and I suppose it helps I did a fine art degree, as I know the only way to get on in the art world is to be pushy, determined and self confident as well as be talented. Unfortunately I didn't have any of those characteristics but Emily does, which still surprises me because she doesn't come across that way.

Emily self portrait


I have joined a new online project being run by Robin Atkins of Beadlust. Its the 2007 Bead Journal project and its beginning in June, running for 12 months. I have often thought of joining these online projects but usually they have begun months before I get there. I have joined the TAST project where Sharon B sets an embroidery stitch a week because I figured I could catch up with that. So far there are 18 stitches and I have managed 1! However, in the coming weeks I plan to be creative at least 3 hours day. Its good time to set a goal like that as the days are longer and brighter, believe it or not, it does get duller in Texas during the winter. Anyway watch for progress on both projects on my arty blog, Puddles of Dreams