I am tired and I don't know why

as I had a good night sleep last night. I am probably stressing myself out too much with the upcoming gynae visit on Wednesday.

Its seems my cycle has returned so menopause has not occurred which is a bummer as I was hoping my reproductive cycle had completed but alas that is not the case. On Wednesday, exactly 4 wks to the day it arrived again. Not that it has made much difference because I have been having cramps for the entire 5 wks before that anyway but at least my breasts aren't as tender as they were. Obviously my estrogen levels have even out a bit.

So why am I stressing out? Because I have too much time on my hands that why. I failed miserably to drag myself away from the PC even though I haven't written here. No need because I didn't actually do anything. Each day is much like the next day and the one before it. I get up at between 6.10 and 7.30, walk the dog and then nothing until Gordon comes home. I am going to drive myself nutty if I don't watch it.

I am not applying for jobs at the moment because I know I will be opting for the hysterectomy option on Wednesday when she suggests I either go back on BC pills or the big one. Given that you can't do anything for about 6 wks after that, not much point in looking for a job when I know I will be taking off so much time. I should have done it a few yrs ago but no-one really wants to be operated on and to be honest until 5 yrs ago, my uterus wasn't giving me any trouble, so I have been fortunate. I really don't know how women go through years of that pain and mine isn't even that bad to be honest. I am not double up in pain or anything like that, just a feeling like mild labour pains, a general discomfort in my pelvic area and sometimes feels like my arse is falling down to the ground but after 5 wks of this, I am getting very fed up with not feeling quite right.

Anyway thats about sums up my week, pretty boring. The one bright light is that I have found another arm to my hobby brief, needlefelting. Stabbing away with that needle is great way to meditate the pain away for an hour or so. Next week I will give making felt ago I think, No I will make some felt this week!