I had a moment of impulse (part 2)

Anyway after WW, I had to go and pick up my sewing machine, my now defunct sewing machine. Apparently the motor was kaput.

I went in there, honestly, just to pick it up. I had agreed with Gordon, not to buy a new one. However, what was the harm in looking, I'm just looking I said to the lady. Nice lady, Colleen who had helped me out the last time and shown me the embellishing machine... a nice buy for $699....ooh I so want one of those!

Well, we have these 2 at ..... and then there are these 2 at ..... So when you are looking to buy a machine, the nice lady said... Soon...would you be interested in a computerized machine? They start out at about $1299 but we have a special offer on at the moment, only $999. Are you interested in embroidery? Aah the magic word...embroidery. I can show you if you would like? Would I like? Of course I would like...are you kidding me! Down I sit at this thing of beauty...way too much for me...but I am just looking.

As she is showing me the beautiful pattern made as like magic at a touch of a button or 2, she mentions, you can buy this on a 6 month plan at interest free, just pay the full amount before the end of the 6 months and all you pay is the cash price. Would you be interested in buying a machine this way, would that be a better way for you, no pressure but it a good way to buy today.

Would I like to buy a machine....ooh ooh ...think.think carefully..before you know it you are saying YES, Yes this is the machine of my dreams. There is a big but in my HEAD however I hear my mouth is saying 'I am going to be impulsive, I am going to buy this machine if I can get the credit. My husband is going to angry but I want to find out if I can get credit in MY NAME. I WANT TO DO THIS ON MY OWN. I explain that I have never had credit in my name in the US (tried before my social security number came but was always denied) so I could only buy if I got the credit.

STUPID, STUPID THING TO DO because now I was backed into a corner if I was approved. IN my head, I was saying to myself, this is stupid! You do not need a sewing machine. You have had 2 other sewing machines and barely used them, so what makes you think a new fancy machine will be any different.

Aah, got you there, because now I am so interested in textiles, I need to make money, I am good at creative things. You need to be more independent, don't listen to Gordon a voice of reason who has lived with your whims and dreams for 25 yrs, who knows although I mean it at the time, I rarely carry out my promises.

Of course, unlike all the other times, this time it will be different. I will show him this time, I will succeed! He is just being unreasonable. He doesn't understand my creative drive, he is just a mean old person who doesn't understand me. So what if he is angry. So what if he is the only person who earning money and paying for all this. So what, if he is driving a car without air conditioning! Its my right, I am a person who has desires, at this moment in time, its a sewing machine I don't need!

So by the time, the nice lady calls me over to check my ssn, I'm convinced that I will buy this machine despite any protestations that Gordon makes. I have make a call to Gordon to check my ssn. He wants to know why? I hedge around the question, scared of his reaction but eventually confess I am about to buy a sewing machine for $1000 if I can get the credit. I can sense him disapproving in the air but I am defiant. He surprises me, he doesn't say NO, he doesn't say NO any time really to my outlandish demands but I know he doesn't approve. Why doesn't he just say NO, that would get me off the hook and I could say to the lady, Sorry I can't but again I am backed into a corner.

I would go out of the shop, kind lady in tow with my prized possession, now she knows I am a lady of determination. The prized is loaded, the adoring lady says thanks and see you soon. I sit in the drivers seat and realise I have made a huge MISTAKE.

2 hours later I am back in the shop, sheepishly admitting I made an impulse buy. By my side is the long suffering Gordon, taking the blame by default as the ogre of a husband who making his wife take the machine of her dreams back. The nice lady is now a scowling disapproving lady who looks at my poor husband at the bad person is this event but really its me.