Today has been a strange day

as it has been very peaceful, relaxing and I keep on thinking it must be Sunday! I haven't really being doing that much. I manage to find out why the dishwasher wasn't filling with water, I finish my latest piece of stitching which I really enjoyed doing and I went on a walk with Gordon. The weather has been absolutely glorious today, sunny but with slight breeze, temp only in the mid 70s. It really has been the perfect day despite failing to do the taxes.

Ah Taxes, they are the bane of my life over here, it seems so complex compared to the UK. This year we have finally decided we will have to go to an expert as the stock issue is so puzzling and way beyond our knowledge. Now it just a case of getting the right expert! Gordon said "you'll be OK to do that wont you?" " sure, I just take all the documents we have accumulated over the years and get them to sort it out." " Hm, before you do that maybe I should write down some details, you know about the shares issue and what not." At that point I said he should take a day off and we will both go. Jeez anything to do with paperwork and Gordon runs mile. Quite rightly to be honest, just that one of us has to do the paperwork and usually its me, muggins, the person who couldn't even get a grade 1 in CSE maths whereas he has a degree in Mathematical Physics. Oh well, at least he agreed to go to a professional this year.

Still I am just as much a wimp. Today I finally told him that for the past 6 months I have been taking anti depressants. It came about because I was remarking on how much Emily is like both of us, eg. Emily cries if she get angry rather than let out the anger. He couldn't understand why she couldn't just express herself and I came out and said " maybe because they are people like you who are bit dictatorial about things." OOPs So we ended up having a discussion about the fact he can be so opinionated about things and only he is right. So why hadn't I told him about the anti depressants? I pointed out that at the time I did say I was taking them but he and Elisabeth jump on my case so much I was made to feel guilty and weak for even admitting I was depressed. So I tried for a couple of weeks to do without but in the end I decided I should give them a go. Now I am glad did because my life is definitely taking an upward swing at the moment, especially in regards to my creative side.

So that is another positive of the anti depressants as far as I can see, as I have been much more open with Gordon over the last few months about certain issues, not just accepting his opinion. which I tended to do over the years.

The only downside of the week was not getting the job at Sears. I was surprised at how disappointed I was. To honest it annoys me that I have managed to micro manage the lives of 4 people for the past 20 odd years and that doesn't get taken into account in my job searching. Oh well that's life I suppose. I will plough on with the job applications and hopefully something will turn up.